Our Needs Change
The other day I was telling my man the plans I had to sign up for a collection of different yoga/pilates/dance classes online, in order to get into a more regular movement practice.
After hearing my plans, he said, “I thought you didn’t like group classes.”
I don’t. Usually.
If I had my choice, my preferred workout is just me and my tunes and the weights at the gym during the mid-afternoon before the after work rush of fellow gym-goers arrive.
But with the arrival of COVID, I've had the hardest time working out with just me and my tunes in my home (we don’t have weights here, so it’s all body weight or soup cans). So my needs have changed. I’m finding that having a set time, date, and teacher is what supports me to partake in moving my body these days (besides the daily hikes at the dog park).
So having that question asked of me out loud by my husband got me contemplating this: sometimes our needs change.
I began to reflect on other areas where this was also true for me.
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Prior to 2020, I found that doing breathwork on my own to my own playlists plus a sprinkling of attending other breathwork groups was a good mix for my own emotional, energetic, and mental well-being. During the stay-at-home orders here in Minnesota and especially after George Floyd’s murder, I found that once again my needs had changed.
I needed to breathe much more regularly and it was really hard to get myself to just lay down and do it on my own, so I signed myself up for weekly groups or individual sessions with my favorite practitioners over the summer. That frequency has since slowed with the arrival of fall as the craving for more physical movement was beginning to call my name.
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What once worked for us might not work any more.
Having needs isn’t a bad thing - it’s a HUMAN thing, so getting good at listening in to what your body, mind, heart, spirit are needing for nourishment and care is key, knowing that it’ll shift and change as we do.
As we grow and evolve, so do our needs. As the world and seasons change, so do our needs.
In the summer, it’s easier to stay up late with the sun and get up early. We might feel more into eating raw veggies and fresh salads and lots of fruits. In the winter, we might need to snuggle in to sleep more and drink warm teas.
In some stages of life, maybe our creativity soars or our hobbies take the lead. Maybe we need more quiet time to process or maybe we need more community connections and activities.
During a pandemic, we might need to offer more grace to ourselves and to our families/coworkers/neighbors. We might need to unplug from the news more or give ourselves more time to reply to emails. We might need more space for creating and we might need more bodywork.
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As we begin to travel into darker and colder days, what is your winter plan? What do you need right now that’s different than what you’ve been doing for yourself?
With the arrival of the holiday season whilst navigating a pandemic, how might we do things differently?
I recently read an article by Priya Parker, author of *The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters* - a book I just read for book club - and she poses a great reframe for what we are experiencing. She says that we have the opportunity for improv. Where we can see the challenges we are facing as an OFFER rather than a curveball. A chance to “reinvent new ways of being together that are safe and still carry some magic”.
“…more creative, phase of reinventing the holiday is asking what is needed from the holiday at this time, rather than the usual question of what the holiday demands of us. Don’t start with questions like, What’s the best way to brine a turkey? Start by asking, What is it that we need this year for this Thanksgiving?… And then figure out the form that makes the most sense.” - Priya Parker
So my wish for you is space for you to ask yourself “what do I need?”, clarity and insight in response to the question, and the resources, creativity, and support to give you what it is you need.
I’m very grateful to have you as part of my community. I know there’s a lot of newsletters and blogs and posts on social media these days, so if you made your way to the bottom of this post, THANK YOU. Your attention and focus here is very much valued and appreciated. Sending vibes of gratitude your way as you navigate this time. xo